Much of the wisdom my father tried to impart to me in my life is only finally starting to make sense. I suppose this is what happens to most men as they age. Suddenly, the realize their fathers weren’t complete idiots.
One of my Dad’s favorite lessons was that woulda, coulda and shoulda doesn’t count in life.
My Dad told me this not long after I resolved to quit the soccer team after the coach started making me play goalie. If you stop playing soccer now, you’ll never play again. He was right and I played – and can still play.
My Dad told me this after I almost didn’t invite my brother Mike to my wedding. It’s a long story but I didn’t want him there. My Dad convinced me and now that Mike is gone, I am really glad he came to my wedding.
My Dad told me this when I had decided to join the Army. He thought it was insane but he knew if I didn’t, I would always regret it. He was right.
What my Dad meant by woulda, coulda and shoulda thinking was that regret never helps. And it always causes trouble.
We know this but it’s hard to keep at it. If you’re like me, regret seems so easy to wallow in.
Let’s you and I make a pact right now – no woulda, couldas and shouldas anymore.
- Trying is better than not trying.
- Failing is better than never trying at all.
- If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.
You know all of the cliches. Use whatever one gets you moving again. I just want to get you moving again.
My Dad wasn’t the wisest man in the world. My Dad was never super-successful in business. He made some huge mistakes and at the end of his life, confessed his myriad regrets.
But this lesson has stuck with me fall of these years. And I am glad for it.
Regret is dangerous.
Remember, woulda, coulda and shouldas don’t count.